Invisible Wings

Invisible Wings

Tomando vuelo con alas invisibles
I take flight with invisible wings
Cada etapa de mi Vida
Every stage of mi Life
Que el Creador revela frente a mi
That Creator sets before me
Voy caminando, despacio
I traverse, slowly
Pero hacia enfrente
But always forward
Este camino rojo, Sagrado
This Sacred red road
Con la magia que esta Vida me a dado
With the magic that this Life has granted me
Tomando mis pasos con la certeza
Taking surefooted steps
Que me llevaran a donde tengo que lleguar
That take me where I need to go
A mi destino ya destinado para mi
To a destiny that has already been destined for me
Halzo mis alas con fe y con Amor
A lift my wings with trust and Love
Y tomo vuelo hacia el horizonte
And I fly towards the horizon
Guiada por la Medicina del Lobo
Guided by Wolf Medicine
Y la Sabiduria del Buho
And the Wisdom of Owl
Hacia los caminos que quedan por traspasar
Towards paths that have yet to be traveled

Suppose

Suppose

What do you suppose I should do about my feelings for you?
Am I suppose to put them away
Put them somewhere cold and dark
In a corner abandoned
Where I can't feel them anymore
So I could forget what it was I felt for you
Am I suppose to smash them, break them up in to little pieces
Throw them out somewhere
Where I will never find them anymore
And never in my life feel them again
Am I suppose to hold them up in front of me
To remind myself that you never
Felt any of these things for me
To remind myself of the things you never did
And of the words you never said
Or do you suppose I should stuff them
Back in the shell where they came from
And hand them over to you
To remind you of all the feelings you lost
When you decided to let go of me.

Do you see me?

Do you see me?

What am I to you
What do you think of when you look at me
I'd like to know
What it is you see
Am I a paper doll
Which you dress up and dress down on a whim
And then toss in a forgotten drawer
After you tear off my limb
Am I a plastic doll
With a plastic house and a plastic bed
Your superficial plaything
A plastic body and an empty head
Am I a porcelain doll
Which you admire and put on a pedestal
Surrounded by dust, left cold and
Alone in a box made of crystal
Or do you see the womb-myn that stands before you
That bleeds like you do, thinks like you do,
And feels like you do.
Tell me, what it is you see.

Seashell

Seashell

She Keeps a Seashell
Where she hides her Love
She folds it, and
Wrings it,
Stuffs it until
The mass Enormity of Love
Fits in the Palm of her
Hand 

Sera real?

Sera real?

Esta nueva sensacion por la misma persona

Sera real? 

Todos esos pensamientos y sentimientos

Los piensas y sientes tu tambien

Mi alma gemela, lo eres tu?

Como sabre que eres el hombre que sueño

Que los sueños se convertiran en realildad?

Sientes lo que siento?

Tambien me quieres besar?

Tambien me quieres acariciar?

Amarme con esa pasion que vi al dormir?

O nadamas vez a esa amiga 

Que siempre sera como una hermana,

Que nunca sabra lo que es un beso tuyo

Los que regalas tan facilmente a todas las demas

Que nunca conocera el calor de tus caricias

Porque estas muy ocupado dandoselas a otras

Que no merecen tu atencion.

Sera real?

O... 

Nadamas estoy soñando otra vez...

Burst out like desire

Burst out like desire

Burst out like desire
For a touch from your
Hand. Manipulates
Feelings, sensuously,
Jealously making me yours,
Not realizing
I am mine alone.
Touching your hand
Envious of its power
To release the passion,
The tingling desire,
Release the pulsating fire
Mine cannot do alone.
My hand
Who writes every hour
Reveling desires
You could never fulfill.
My Hand holding desires
I must conquer alone.

Medicine Dreams

Medicine Dreams

Medicine comes to me 

As Dreams 

They fill my Self

My Soul bursting with 

Healing Power

Great enough to stop

The passing of time

The force of gravity

I hold in my hands

I pass from one dimension 

To the next

With ease 

Seeing Pasts and Futures

That few will open 

Their Hearts to

World Peace and Balance

It Exist

I saw it

With my Soul's Eye

As my mortal body rested

Gave birth to a New Mundo

In the form of a Snake

With the beauty of 

A thousand rainbows

And the Power of Creation

The Power to Heal

Our Madre 

Tierra

Broken

Broken

Disbelief rushes into my eyes

Then the pain washes over me

As the panic sets in 

As I see with horror

My heart trampled 

And tossed

Like a rag doll

Under that monstrous marvel of technology

His broken body

Laying there

Lifeless

My heart breaks

His heart stops

I run towards my broken life

Pick up his limp body

I scream agony

Pierce through heaven

With my cry

Force God to hear me

To give him back

Look down at my broken angel

Blood covers his cherub face

My angel, my love, my life

Opens his eyes and looks up at me

And breaks free from the 

Cold grip of 

Death

And stays in the

Warm arms of

His Mother.

Useless Drops

Useless Drops

I don’t know how to be here

Without you

Nothing is the same.

Hear their voices swirl around me

Happy, cheerful.

Doesn’t take away the emptiness

I feel

All alone 

In a room full of people.

My presence like a black hole

In contrast to

The sunshine you always brought.

Tears flow like a floodgate open

Useless drops 

Won’t bring you back.

Butterfly

Butterfly

Little Butterfly you came
To guide my way
Sad and sorry you didn't
Come here to stay
Came to me only for
A little while
When I feel you around
Your presence makes me smile
Strange how it is Butterfly
To miss you,
You who I never really knew
When dreams and visions swirl together
I can see your face
How I prayed for just one small embrace
Butterflies, like Angels, are so very hard to hold
But while you beat your wings around me
I will never feel cold
The ancients promise four years only
Until your spirit journey will adjourn
From the time you departed, Butterfly,
I have awaited your return
It is not yet time and already I despair
And I have lost hope
You watch from where you are
How I unnecessarily mope
When I close my eyes I still can feel your heartbeat
This humble heart stays open to you, Butterfly,
Until again we meet.
Ometeotl.

¿Que te escribire?

¿Que te escribire?

¿Que te escribire?

Tu que no estas,

Tu que no vendras.

¿Que te escribire?

¿Deveras mereces mis palabras?

¿Mereces mi atencion?

¿Para que te doy algo que 

nunca me brindaste a mi?

No entiendo porque sigo escribiendo

Esto versos que nunca te ganaste,

Como esos besos que te di

Tampoco fueron merecidos.

Mi amor es mas grande que tu

Mas grande que lo que te puedas imaginar.

Mas de lo que alcansaste a ver 

Y que nunca veras jamas,

Porque mi amor esta esperando aquel,

Aquel hombre que si tenga la paciencia y el deseo.

El que se tome su tiempo para comprobrar

Que hay alguien en este mundo que merece 

Mis palabras,

Mis besos, y 

Mi Amor.

~Me

Once In a Blue Moon

Once In a Blue Moon

Once in a blue moon

I ran with the dinosaurs

Swam with a blind turtle

Who liked to swim backwards

Once in a blue moon

I observed three killer whales

Larger than life

Breaching through the ocean waves

Once in a blue moon

I traveled through space

Went through a black hole

And I saw the other side

Once in a blue moon

I felt the earth move

Lead others to safety

And looked out at the devastation

Once in a blue moon

I felt the ocean waters rising

Guided the children to higher ground

Then I saw it on the morning news

Once in a blue moon

I saw the earth spew fire

Inhaled the ash that filled the air

Then I saw it on prime time news

Once in a blue moon

I flew in for my own wedding

Couldn’t see a thing but the mountains 

And my non-existent husband’s face

Once in a blue moon

I took a walk through the woods

Found my medicine

Shape-shifted into a Wolf

Once in a blue moon

I was full of life

Swollen belly undulating waves

But it didn’t last

Once in a blue moon

I stopped the passing of time

Defied the laws of physics

Moved things with my mind

Once in a blue moon

I heard love fall from your lips

Came out through mine too

But I was mistaken

Once in a blue moon

I saw the truth

Was guided by owl medicine

Towards a new path to follow

~Me

To The Girl With The Thorn In Her Side - R.I.P (Rest In Power)

To The Girl With The Thorn In Her Side - R.I.P (Rest In Power)

(words borrowed from Steven Patrick Morrissey)

Gabby, there is something I wanted to tell you.  

Our frank and open conversations stopped me 

From thinking all the time so deeply, so bleakly. 

When I said that joke isn’t funny anymore, it still was.  

Sometimes I think I have forgiven Jesus for deciding 

That he wasn’t so sure the world deserved you 

But then at midnight I can’t get you out of my head.  

And if you never knew how much I really loved you, 

It’s because I never even told you but I meant to. 

Muffin, I will see you in far off places because 

I know its going to happen someday.

Rabanos forever!

P.S. Your spirit is the light that will never go out.

Grandmother Spider

Grandmother Spider

Spider, my guide
Weaver of Life
Of Thought
I find you
When I need to be reminded
Of my own Power
To Create.
I lose myself
Sometimes in the
Web of my insecurities
Get tangled
En mis Fracasos
But you're always
There to Lead me
Towards the right Road
Untangle Me
Weave a New Path
Together
Creation
Becomes Us.

~ Me

Volando Free

Volando Free

I flew away last night
Spread my wings
Fluttered them once or twice
Y me luego, me fui.
Aveces las preocupaciones de este mundo
Pesan demasiado y me tengo que ir.
Sometimes the brightness of a great day is
Shadowed by one small event
That throws me back into the darkness
Y tengo que tomar vuelo.
Volando con mis alas de color
Vibrante como un arco iris cuando sale el sol
After the storm has passed away.
I need that release sometimes,
That freedom that I can only achieve
Cuando dejo mi cuerpo mortal
Y dejo mi espiritu volar, libre,
Como una mariposa que nadie puede atrapar.

~ Me

Mariposas

Mariposas

I miss the butterflies

Not the ones I see fluttering about

I see them all the time

Whenever I go out

I miss the butterflies

The ones I felt fluttering inside of me

Every time I saw your face, your smile

Those butterflies that no one can see

But those butterflies got away from me

When they realized they were all alone

They knew nothing would come out of

The lack of interest you have shown

Still they look for you wherever we go

Hoping, waiting that someday

They won’t be alone and that

“I felt them too” is what you’ll say

-Me

¿Quien se atrevería?/Who would dare?

¿Quien se atrevería?

¿Quien se atrevería
A caminar al lado de aquella mujer
Esa mujer que a diario habla con el Sol
Y conversa con la Luna,
Que le canta al Mar
Y escucha los consejos de las Olas?

¿Quien se atrevería
A estar a su lado
Cuando les cuenta a los pájaros su último sueño
O su última pesadilla,
Cuando le da los buenos días al gato callejero
Y las buenas tardes a los cuervos ruidosos?

¿Quien se atrevería
A pasar la tarde junto a ella
En ese completo, pesado, impenetrable silencio
Por horas y horas
Nada mas para ser repentinamente sorprendido
Por ese cacareo que es su risa,
Que llega sin provocación ni razón?

¿Quien se atrevería
A pasar las noches
Junto aquella mujer que
Oye las voces de los espíritus
En las hojas de los árboles y
En ese viento suave que acaricia su piel? 

¿Quien se atrevería
A estar con ella en la madrugada,
Agotado por satisfacer su apetito carnal insaciable
Y ser repentinamente despertado por su llanto,
Ella llena de sudor frío, temblando,
Y sin poder explicarte porque esta así?

¿Quien se atrevería
A escuchar esos murmullos indistinguibles
Día y Noche,
Cuando ella le reza al Creador,
A la Madre Tierra,
Al Búho en la ventana,
Los murmullos de aquella curandera
Que nunca lo fue,
Que nunca supo controlar su magia
Vaga y perdida sin saber porque?

¿Quien se atrevería
A compartir su corazón
Con aquella loca que
Aúlla con los lobos,
Canta con las gaviotas,
Y llora con la lluvia,
Con aquel complejo que se atreve
A caminar con el resto de la humanidad
Y hacerse pasar por uno de ellos?

¿Quien se atrevería
A entregar su vida entera
A la inútil misión de comprenderla
Y a la certeza de tener su amor?

Who would dare?

Who would dare

To walk next to that woman

That woman who everyday talks to the Sun

And converses with the Moon

Who sings to the Ocean

And listens to the advice of the Waves?

Who would dare

To be at her side

When she tells the birds about her latest dream

Or her latest nightmare,

When she greets the alley cat

And bids the noisy crows a good afternoon?

Who would dare

To spend the afternoon next to her

In that complete, heavy, impenetrable silence

For hour upon hour

Only to be suddenly startled

By that cackle of a laugh

That comes unprovoked and without reason?

Who would dare

Spend their evenings

Next to that woman that

Hears the voices of the spirits

In the leaves of the trees and 

In the soft breeze that caresses her skin?

Who would dare

To be with her in the middle of the night,

To be exhausted from satisfying that insatiable carnal appetite,

To be suddenly awakened by her cries,

She, covered in cold sweat, trembling,

And unable to tell you why?

Who would dare

To listen to that unintelligible muttering

Day and Night

As she prays to Creator

To Mother Earth

To the Owl at the window

The muttering of that curandera

Who never came to be

Who never learned to control her magic

Wandering and lost without knowing why?

Who would dare

Share his heart

With that crazy woman that

Howls with the wolves

Sings with the gulls

And cries with the rain

With that complexity that dares

To walk with the rest of humanity

And pass her self off as one of them?

Who would dare

To give their entire life

To the futile task of understanding her

And the certainty of having her love?

~ Me

Space for Poetry

When I was in middle and high school, for a long time I thought I would make my living writing poems.  I imagined myself living in Paris or London sitting at cafes (or my balcony) writing furiously as tourists passed by.  Well, life took many, many turns and I ended up teaching instead in Los Angeles. Although I love my career, I do feel I need an outlet where I can bring back the passion for poetry I had as a kid.  I'm starting this blog so I can publish my poetry somewhere, even though it won't pay my bills as I once imagined, at least it will be out there somewhere.  I will probably also post poems and lyrics of others that I enjoy.  I will give them full credit, of course.  I hope those of you that stumble upon this blog enjoy the poetry.

"Y fue a esa edad...Llego la poesia a buscarme" -Pablo Neruda